Depression

Emotions and how they speak to our Conscious Mind

Elise Albenesius — Wed, 24 Jul 2019 07:38:03 +0000

**Note from the editor: We aim to provided a holistic approach to spiritual and emotional growth and wellness. Any and all treatments and healings should be discussed with your healer, mental health and health practitioners before hand. This article is intended to provide information and should not be accepted as medical or psychological advice.

Our emotions have been subjected to suppression; in the education system, work environments, community gatherings and even in family and celebratory events. Basically society seems as if they don’t want us aware of ourselves or are surroundings. As if we are here for everyone else but ourselves. That is simply not true no matter how indoctrinated society as a whole has become.

Medication has numbed an entire (mostly American and Asian) population of people. The mass accepted modern medicine inclination that “care” and “numbing” equate to “healing” is VERY dangerous and obviously wrong in the eyes of any holistician, nutritionist, chiropractor, or physical therapist. Pain, is a feeling, an emotion, of the physical body which is warning you of how to respond not ignore the area. Without pain we would never know what is wrong with the body, where it is coming from, or what it takes to lessen the pain.

If you think very literally of your emotions as “internal feelings” it is very clear to understand why it is so important to be able to listen to these and not have them obstructed by modern pill medications or emotional disassociation (a result of emotional and physical abuse). Emotions are our bodies’ internal dialogue system; a result of our aura field picking up on the surroundings and therefore communicating with us of what is around us energetically. Hard to spell out or label but easy to feel. That is why they are so important. I have been observing my emotions for a long time now, and have come to an amazing conclusion recently about anxiety specifically. Here is a little story of how my anxiety was reading my surroundings and protecting me.

As I was driving down the road, with beautiful mountain scenery, on cruise control in a very peaceful state; this being a 2 hour drive that I am very familiar with the route, I noticed at two different occasions my anxiety kick in full force, for no reason, no one behind me, no thought on my mind creating the anxiety. I wondered why? What followed within 10 minutes (not instantly) of these anxiety spikes where police cars, radar detecting the drivers on the highway. Wow I thought! That’s what my anxiety was! It was warning me! As someone with PTSD I have never viewed my anxiety or depression as anything but a horrible result of my upbringing, until this moment. This has completely changed my understanding of my emotions, my intuition, and what they have been trying to tell me. These feelings were not a result of abuse or being weak, they are a warning, a guide, and our greatest protection for self preservation. I now am viewing my depression as speaking – “you are Not in the right place”, my anxiety – “watch out, proceed with caution”, my joy obviously confirming “I am in the right place”, and my fear as standing for “false evidence appearing real”. Giddy anxious feelings are saying “something good is to come”.

So if your overwhelmed, please take time to listen to your emotions, they change with your state of mind, the entertainment you watch, the surroundings, and the people you spend time with. Choose the positive over the negative; though it might be lonely at times, you don’t need t exclude the world completely to feel better. Personal boundaries allow you to feel better what is all around you. Spend time feeling and listening to your emotions to learn how to navigate your life in a direction that takes you to happiness, instead of misery or a pill bottle. Namaste

The post Emotions and how they speak to our Conscious Mind appeared first on .

This is what depression looks like.

Juanita Pienaar — Wed, 10 Jul 2019 13:16:21 +0000

That’s me… The woman in the picture. She looks happy, doesn’t she? She looks like she’s got her shit together, doesn’t she? Look at that smile… look at the pretty hair and dress…

This is what depression looks like.

It is getting up and showing up when it feels like you are living underwater and every movement you make is met by resistance. It is the inability to even attempt to help yourself with positive thinking and meditation because even just lying there with your eyes closed and with your mind focused is still too much effort.

It is just sitting there breathing into the nothingness in your chest hoping the breath will somehow fill the void, fill the emptiness, lighten the heaviness. It is a fluttering heart and inconsolable anxiety over absolutely nothing.

It is trying to claw yourself out of a hole because the world is carrying on and you need to show up, you need to contribute, you need to convince yourself and everyone around you that you matter, even when your entire being resonates with thoughts about how you don’t.

It is knowing that you have so much to do, so much that you want to do but your body feels impossibly heavy and your mind feels like it is filled with cotton wool.

And you know it is not normal. But you cannot remember when you started to feel this way… you don’t even know what normal feels like.

It is sitting on the couch so full of nothing that you start to wonder what the point is of you even being on this earth… that you contemplate cutting yourself just to feel something… and the only thing stopping you from grasping that knife is the fact that there is no space on your body to inflict this ‘feel’ where your partner wouldn’t see… that wouldn’t make him ask questions.

I am a yoga teacher… I am a hippy… I am supposed to be balanced and grounded and whole and healed. I am supposed to not take pharmaceuticals and aspire to living a natural life. But what is the point of living a natural life if you have no desire to LIVE?

So, finally I caved and asked my doctor to prescribe me antidepressants. We started off with a low dose and the changes are nearly tangible. I have days, or perhaps moments, where I can feel what normal feels like. When the heaviness lifts and I feel like I am taking my first breath of fresh air after years in a stale, musty cave. And I was. My cave was called depression.

I felt like a failure. Because I am supposed to have control over my body, my mind and my emotions. I have all the tools, all the knowledge, and know just how powerful my mind can be. Because light and love, everybody- I am supposed to be able to heal myself… it is all in the mind, right?

It’s not. My depression is a symptom of an autoimmune disease. And even if it wasn’t, I am now learning that it is nothing to be ashamed of. I am starting to speak out about depression. To tell people that I have depression and how it has affected my life – something that I didn’t want to admit for a very long time.

Sometimes people are supportive. Sometimes people joke about it, asking if I’m a bit mad in the head… I say ‘yes’. Because no more running, no more hiding.

Often people say to me: ‘I would never have thought, you seem so happy and amazing and do such great work with your website, you help people’. I guess we just never know.

I guess we just never know just exactly what depression looks like.

There are so many resources available for people experiencing depression. There is no shame in speaking out about it – it is actually very empowering… starting to focus on your healing. I have found an interesting article about the benefits of turmeric and how it could help depression and anxiety. Read more about that here.

The post This is what depression looks like. appeared first on .

How our environment can impede or replenish our joy

Elise Albenesius — Sat, 27 Apr 2019 08:46:06 +0000

Now that we have viewed depression from a physical stand point, let’s take a look at our environment and how it impedes or replenishes joy into our daily lives.

Family and Friends

Jealousy in these relationships is very unhealthy and also very counterproductive for growth and development in any aspect of your life and the lives of the ones around you. If you notice you get better energy from strangers than your own inner circle it’s a BIG warning sign to Run!

Now I understand with finances and lack of community support this can be difficult and take more time than you would like to make a move. But your life isn’t here to be miserable, it’s here to blossom like a flower. You can view yourself as a plant, and view the ones closest to you as other plants in a garden. How does it look, feel, smell, when you look from this perspective. Do you feel like a flower with little pests eating holes in your leaves?

I would have compared myself to that flower when I was living in direct vicinity with individuals who did not feed my interests or emotional needs. There is a concept in healthy organic gardening called Companion Planting. It is based in chemistry between the plants, and how some aid each other’s growth and others die in the presence of another plant due to it absorbing the same nutrients or releasing things the other plant does not require.

A pretty flower flourishing in a healthy garden really has a lot to do with what’s growing around the flower. Being different than the ones you have been raised around might seem challenging but if you plant yourself with people who are like minded you can find your experience of life change completely.

Location:

Do you resonate with where you live, or are you simply there because it is where you have always been? Are you bored with your routine and interactions on a daily basis? Does the level of comfort with your surroundings feel binding?

I have lived in different states and different cultural zones in America and it’s so interesting how a change of environment can change your outlook on life and also the way you are being treated on a regular basis. Societal factors, expectations, and social status contribute to living a life that does not serve you spiritually. The world would feel like a better place if everyone chased their dreams full force. It would be so cool if our friends and family supported our ideas and dreams as well but that’s not always the case.

Work:

I have worked for the best management and the worst; it’s so amazing how things can change when you are working with difficult people vs. people of integrity. You can’t chance the workplace, but you can change yourself. Applying to jobs that appeal to your desires, spiritual, and mental development or physical needs can be revitalizing.

Some jobs that are emotionally fulfilling can be working for your local recycling program, no-kill animal shelters, non-profit organizations, locally owned companies, or vacation retreats, resorts, or campgrounds. These jobs are small in comparison to corporate positions but they are out there. Being in the sun, doing what you’re passionate about, helping your community are all things that fulfill the organic soul while working a job that you don’t like dulls all aspects of your life.

Cleaning your Aura and Chakras with the 3 S’s:

The three S’s are salt, sage, and sound healing. Salt removes negative energy from you, your home, and your belongings. It can be sprinkled on the floor prior to sweeping, added to your body wash and shampoo, used for cleaning dishes, and put in your laundry detergent. This is a passive way to clear your auric field and energetic space regularly.

As a self-taught specialist in Hand Massage, I love adding salt in my hand wash. Anytime I use it throughout the day it is not only cleaning my skin, but purifying the very crucial energy centres in the body. These energy centres are conductors for the physical transmission of energy healing.

As far as sage goes, I love adding rose petals and lavender to my smudge sticks, and always remember to leave windows open to allow the smoke to exit a room, home, or vehicle. Sage Goddess has a wonderful range of smudges here.

Sound healing is a great way to amplify your environment, I love crystal bowls and Tibetan singing bowls. Sage Goddess has some beautiful singing bowls here. These can be listened to in the car, while you clean, sleep, or played behind regular music simultaneously. Other sounds to cause energetic change for the better are listening to music on YouTube with Hertz frequencies such 852 hz or 528 hz. I have also noticed my wind chimes sometimes vibrate the same sounds as singing bowls and require no technology to hear.

**Disclosure: Some of the links in this post are “affiliate links.” This means we may garner a small commission at no cost to you if you choose to make a purchase. Read our full Affiliate Disclosure Statement for more information.

How has your environment impeded or amplified your joy? Let us know in the comments below.

Sign up for a free self-worth email course with the form below or follow this link for information on the Remembering your worth e-course.

The post How our environment can impede or replenish our joy appeared first on .

Gratitude and the pursuit of becoming undepressed

Juanita Pienaar — Fri, 12 Apr 2019 08:43:15 +0000

It is no secret that I have been suffering from depression for a few years now… maybe a few decades – it’s never easy to pinpoint just when things had gotten quite so ‘off’.

When I was studying psychology at uni a lecturer once said that with any kind of mental disorder we should phrase it as ‘she has depression’ as opposed to ‘she is depressed’ to distance the individual from the disease. To help the individual to still have an identity outside of the disease or disorder.

For me though… I did not have depression. I was depressed. I had crawled deep down the dark depression hole and made my home there. Even when I was living my best life – I was a dive instructor working on tropical islands with unimaginably clear water and perfect, sunny days nearly year round. My life looked amazing from the outside. But looking out from the inside everything was just grey for me. Just dark and grey and empty.

A few months ago I started actively working on my depression – I’m not one for taking medications all willy-nilly and didn’t think that antidepressants was the way to go for me (more recently I caved and started taking that supposedly ‘magical’ little pill while I keep pursuing the natural solutions that I speak of below. Please don’t take any of this as medical advice – discuss it with your medical or mental health practitioner). So I decided to treat my depression naturally. You know, with meditations and supplements, being present and in the moment… binaural beats… I tried anything and everything. And the combination of the parts seem to work.

But wait, I hear you say… this article is supposed to be about gratitude… Isn’t it? Here is the thing: I have come to realise that when I feel the most depressed and I start to tumble down that dark hole, I feel the tightness in my chest and the anxiety creeping in, if I just pay attention to the moment I can catch it… and stop it. If I am able to be aware and be conscious in the moment and pay attention to my thoughts I notice that more and more negative thoughts start creeping in. If I let it go- just give in to the habit of letting my mind rush off, pulling me along and yanking me off my feet and out of balance – I end up spiraling down into thoughts that get progressively worse. Thoughts that get toxic. Thoughts that come close to being abusive. Man, I am a mean person to myself sometimes!

In the last month I have made a huge effort to be grateful. To express gratitude as often as I can (I even downloaded a gratitude app that reminds me to list a few things I am grateful for each day) – and I have seen the powerful effect it has had on my life, on my relationships and on the joy that I experience in life. I have seen how very, very sweet life can be if you start focusing on the wonderful bits- people who love you, the taste of food, flowers blooming in the early spring, being able to tie my shoes by myself! Let’s be honest, some days it’s a bit of a struggle to find something to be grateful for, so I just go with it and make something up as I go along. You can find some wonderful gratitude journals here.

Some days when I struggle to catch myself from falling off the precipice that separates a joyful (or even just slightly content) me from ‘curled-up-in-a-foetal-position-rocking-back-and-forth- me’ I find that I cannot find anything to write on my gratitude list- I cannot even be grateful that I am able to tie my own shoes! On these days I sit and stare at that pink screen on my phone with its little inspirational quote and I rebel. I think ‘I don’t want to be grateful for anything… this life sucks’. It is an effort just to think of something to be grateful for – even when I have so many blessings in my life- and I am fully aware of them.

In these moments the comfort of my depression is too tempting. It is too familiar and easy. It is years and decades of conditioning. It is centuries of conditioning inherited from ancestors. It is karmic contracts and lessons needing to be learnt… and realising that is something to be grateful for in itself. Perhaps it is the thing to be most grateful for. That we can learn these lessons and end these contracts and clear this age old karma… finally.

I have found that in the moments where I can catch those negative thoughts- when I can find just ONE thing that I am grateful for in those grey moments before the dark sets in- it starts to flow. ‘I am grateful that my eyes are healthy. ‘I am grateful for my dogs’ ‘I am grateful for this amazing new BRA!’. So, some days I need to work a little harder to find the things that I am grateful for. Some days it sounds really lame. But it starts building momentum and once I am out of the pull of the depression and the negative thoughts I get into the flow. And man, when it flows it flooooows!

But the seduction is always there, always beckoning like a chocolate cake when you’re on an auto immune diet. It is so tempting to just be consumed by its deliciousness, to give in to the cravings and savour the sweet comfort of it. But you know that if you do you will just end up feeling like rubbish. It takes an ocean full of self-control to say ‘No thank you, I prefer to feel happy and healthy without you’ ‘I choose not to give in to your little lies and tricks of seduction’ ‘I have been down that road many, many times and that is not where I want to be’. ‘I will struggle to be grateful today, because I know tomorrow will be easier and the next day will flow with even more ease’.

Stay grateful, keep minding those negative thoughts. Keep pulling away from the seduction of the depression. Use the help of that little pill if you need to… and maybe one day you will wake up and struggle to pinpoint just exactly when you became ‘undepressed’.

*Disclosure: Some of the links in this post are “affiliate links.” This means we may garner a small commission at no cost to you if you choose to make a purchase. Read our full Affiliate Disclosure Statement for more information.

How has practicing gratitude affected your life? Tell us in the comments below.

Sign up for our free mini self-worth course with the form below, or click here to find out about our Remembering your worth e-course.

The post Gratitude and the pursuit of becoming undepressed appeared first on .

Observing Depression through food and exercise

Elise Albenesius — Fri, 05 Apr 2019 10:41:03 +0000

**Note from the editor. All opinions expressed by our writers are their own. It does not replace guidance from a registered mental health professional. Now, let’s get on to our article…

I have had depression for what seems to be on and off my entire 31 years. Though I am an intelligent, kind, and fun-loving person with integrity, it still continues to creep back into my life from time to time. I have never taken prescription medicine for it though, as that is against my religion. So what can we do from here? I believe self-love or self-acceptance is integral part in addressing any emotional issue, as to not look at it from a self-blaming (emotional) perspective but from a mental (knowledgeable) stand point.

That being said, I view depression as natural part of the human emotional experience. Just as rain storms occur regularly, our teary and dark emotions need to be released as well. This is where observation comes in to play. Crucial elements are needed to release and absorb serotonin, mainly diet and exercise.

Diet

The latest science reveals that the majority of serotonin is released by the solar plexus, “our 2^nd brain” and absorbed through the large intestines.

With that knowledge it is easy to see how inorganic foods and overeating can disrupt the absorption of serotonin. With this awareness a change of diet can dramatically enrich the positive aspects of your life. I also recommend looking into your family history, where you come from, and what they ate. We might live in a modern society with availability to anything and everything to eat, but your DNA comes from somewhere, and that place had specific diet restrictions due to what was possible to grow in the region.

Getting in tune with native foods culturally and locally can give you the specific nutrients you need to thrive as well as connect you to your natural environment. Visiting a farmers market not only is fun, but you can purchase foods you have never seen in a grocery store, bringing you nutrients you’ve never had. Learning also stimulates the brain which will occur as you figure out how to cook these natural foods.

Exercise

Exercise doesn’t need to be exhausting or at a gym. Simple yoga poses can be held for up to 20 breaths, which is much more than 20 seconds. When you start a yoga posture you may only be able to stay in it for 3-5 breaths. Daily practice only needs to be 10 minutes at a time, am and pm, and can be considered an active meditation- a way to calm and focus your internal energy- and develops strength and aligns the spine.

Never underestimate the power of “planks” as there are So many variations: resting on elbows and knees or either. Or pull one leg up for some serious abs, bent knee leg up. When in full plank position you can bring your knee up and in towards your belly button or shoulder, opposite shoulder, back to full plank and lift your leg up and to the back.

Calisthenics are done regularly in many countries at work and school just like lunch break is offered, exercise is as well. And never underestimate the JOY that is jumping jacks or jump rope, which are used in MMA training. For the record, men: Pilates was created by a Male German Boxer, and women were not allowed to do yoga for hundreds of years, it was created by men. And there is definitely no need to have a certain body type or the right (and fashionable) yoga outfit to step onto the mat.

These simple changes to a depressed routine can ignite much more happiness into the body and help you start living a happier and healthier life.

What alternative methods helped you deal with depression? How has it worked for you? Tell us in the comments below.

Sign up for our free self-worth email course with the form below of find out more about our Remembering your worth e-course here.

The post Observing Depression through food and exercise appeared first on .

The blank white screen of depression

Juanita Pienaar — Mon, 16 Apr 2018 07:58:34 +0000

I used to think depression is dark and scary. A big dark hole or tunnel that surrounds you, cuts you off from everything you know and love and leaves you sitting naked on cold stone, hugging yourself in a fetal position trying to conserve the last bit of warmth you hold, trying to keep the cold and dark from soaking into your body, your mind, your heart, your soul. Sometimes depression is this.

Sometimes depression is a blank white screen of nothingness. Of sitting alone with your thoughts and trying desperately to will the numbness away. To entice yourself to feel… anything. You take the quiet time, you take a break, you sit with the feeling, because after decades of fighting it, judging it, trying to convince yourself it isn’t there you finally learned what it is. Depression. You know its name and you know how it feels. You know how to recognise it when it first starts seeping into your skin, crawls up from the tips of your hair to the roots, claws at your ankles and shins. ‘I am getting depressed, I feel lost, I feel lonely, I feel helpless.’ Help me.

But no one can. People can create safe spaces for you and guide you. They can sit with you and send you quote after quote about how beautiful life is and what you need to be grateful for. But you find yourself sitting amidst this raging storm of magic that they find in life with a heart that feels like it is beating empty. With tears crawling down your face from eyes that stare but do not see.

You have worked so hard on self-love, self-care and acceptance, convincing yourself that you are worthy to breathe until you knew it rather than just felt it. You hang your head as the feeling of futility washes over you and spills over onto your cheeks. All that hard work and you are right back where you started. Purposeless, worthless, nothing. But your lungs insist on breathing, on expanding and contracting and your heart insists on beating the empty.

So you focus on your breath, every inhale deeper, every exhale longer. Until you feel your entire chest moving with the motions. You feel how your diaphragm expands and contracts, pushing your tummy in and out. It makes you feel a bit light headed and you convince yourself you can feel the beat of your heart. You just sit. And you breathe. And you feel your heart pumping the nothingness… pumping the life… This is enough for this moment. In this moment, find purpose in breathing, in your heart pumping in being alive. It is ok to have moments where just being alive is enough.

Feel it in your body. Feel the tingling of the aliveness in your middle toe and your ring finger. Find it in that small spot at the back of your ear. Feel it in your left nostril as the cold air caresses it when you inhale, and in your navel that rises and falls with your breathing. Sit with it and notice all the spaces where you can find aliveness in your body. Feel the nothingness fade away slowly, moment by moment until you are ready to come back to yourself in the full knowing that you are enough, that where you are and what you have now is enough. When you are ready, straighten your back and lift your face. Realise that what you want, what you desire is yours for the taking. Go and make it happen. Slow and steady does not always win the race… but then, you are your only competition anyway.

The post The blank white screen of depression appeared first on .